I returned to the Goma refugee camp and reunited with Joseph's colleagues.
Now, Doctors Without Borders had returned. His former partner, Adam, had been promoted to coordinator for the entire Goma project.
The moment we saw each other, no words were spoken, but tears flowed uncontrollably.
After crying together for half an hour, I told him I had come back to search for Joseph.
He led me to the warehouse, where some of Joseph's belongings were still there.
"We evacuated in a hurry, and many things were left unorganized," Adam explained.
Inside a box, I found a few scattered items: a paper card, a packet of flower seeds, a set of keys, several medical books, a stethoscope...
These little things, so closely tied to him, transported me back to three years ago.
I could almost hear his voice, "You're here!"
I remembered walking into his dorm one afternoon, seeing him sitting on a chair, reading a book, casually twirling a pen.
Adam, too, seemed melancholy.
"These things should have been dealt with long ago, but I thought maybe one day you'd return to sort them out for him, so I kept them.
"I never expected that day would come."
I accepted the items solemnly.
"Adam, thank you.
"I'm the one who came too late."
Later, I told him I still wanted to replace out the whereabouts of the children from that time.
He promised he would keep an eye out, though he cautioned me not to get my hopes up after so many years.
After everything was settled, I returned to my dorm.
It was then I received a message from my colleagues.
They said Jackson had come to replace me.
I didn't show up on the wedding day.
His parents were furious.
He searched everywhere for me.
When he finally asked my colleagues, he found out I had gone to the Democratic Republic of the Congo.
He refused to believe it, causing a scene at the hospital and almost being taken away by the police.
I sighed, unable to make sense of it.
If he had someone else he loved, then where did I stand in all of this?
Not wanting to make things difficult for my colleagues, I decided to video call Jackson.
As soon as the call connected, my breath caught in my throat.
On the screen, he looked disheveled.
The room was dim, smoke swirling in the air.
The floor was littered with empty bottles.
"Zoey??"
"Is it really you?"
He stared at me in disbelief, rubbing his eyes repeatedly.
"... You really are something."
He scoffed, burying his face in his hands.
"You actually ran off to Africa just because of a few words from Sara?"
"Are you out of your mind?"
My anger flared, and for a moment, I regretted contacting him at all.
I was about to hang up when I saw the large drops of liquid falling from between his fingers.
"You can't... play with your life like this!!
"How can you make me worry so much??!"
Suddenly, I felt absurd.
"Worry about me?
"Our relationship started with you using me to placate your parents, and I used
you as a substitute to ease my loneliness. There was no real affection..."
He shouted, cutting me off.
"To hell with real affection!
"Do you know, when I went out to replace Sara that day, I couldn't stop thinking about
you! I was worried about how you'd get home after drinking so much!
"Your camera broke, I ran around all the camera shops in the city to replace one. They all said it was too old, so I asked my friends abroad to help, flew over myself to get it for you!
"You disappeared without a word. They told me you went to the DRC, and I couldn't sleep, searching online all night!"
"You made me fall in love with you, then you just left me!"
"How could you do that?!"
His eyes were red.
The expression on his face reminded me of a stray dog at the doorstep.
" '...Please come back?"
He pulled out the ring I had thrown away, his voice humble.
"The wedding date can be set again. I will only marry you..."
We stared at each other for a long time.
Finally, I smiled.
"Jackson, you never really understood me. How can you say you love me?"
"Who is Sara, and who are you to make me act out of spite?"
"I came back because the person I love is here."
His pupils dilated, and in pain, he swept everything off the table.
"Who is he? Who is he, really?!"
I coldly ended the call.
"You don't need to know."
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