Bound in Blood (Broken Bloodlines Book 3)
Bound in Blood: Chapter 63

Everything hurts. Every cell in every inch of my body. But I could deal with all of that if there weren’t such a deep, gnawing ache in my heart. So many are gone. Crescent wolves and Dragon vampires whose names I don’t even know. Vasilis. Enora. Cadence. And for what? Because Giorgios wanted more power? Did he not have enough already? And to what end?

I lie with my head nestled against Malachi’s chest, aware of Axl and Xavier lying behind me and Alexandros sitting on the edge of the bed. Their concern for me is thick and cloying. I wish I could enjoy our victory, bask in their love and the comfort of their presence. But I’m too overwhelmed with guilt and grief, the weight of emotion crushing me.

Why did I get to come back when they didn’t? Perhaps when I spoke with Lucifer, I should have bargained for their lives instead of selfishly asking for my own.

“You have nothing to feel guilty for, agápi mou,” Alexandros says soothingly, his warm hand resting on my bare calf. “Those who made sacrifices did so willingly, and they did it because they believed in you. They wanted you to live. Do not dishonor their memories by regretting that outcome.”

I’m unable to agree with him, unable to stop a river of tears from pouring out of my eyes. The logical part of my brain knows he speaks the truth, but right now, it’s still too much.

“How did you come back to us, Cupcake?” Xavier asks, his fingers trailing over my back.

Thankful for a change of subject, I shuffle into a sitting position and scrub the tears from my cheeks. “It was always supposed to be my light. That was the sacrifice that was needed. To kill a wraith, you have to return his soul, and to do that, you have to announce his name.”

It was never supposed to be me. Those words resound in my head, and I know the boys and Alexandros hear them too. My eyes replace his. “You gave me Salem’s name, therefore Lucifer didn’t need to take my soul in return for it. So, he gave me a choice.” I can still recall the gentle tone of his voice. His obsidian eyes, full of both sorrow and compassion, when he asked me where I wanted to go next. “I wanted to come back, but then I was in the dark …” I suck in a shaky breath, reliving the eerie feeling of being lost in the abyss. Of absolute nothingness. The fear when I realized I no longer had my light to guide me. And then they brought me back to them. “And then I heard you all calling for me … and I followed the sound, and somehow, I found my way back.”

Malachi presses a kiss on my temple. “We would have come and found you if we needed to, baby.”

“M-maybe I should have—” I choke on a sob. “I should have asked him to save the others instead.”

“When dealing with the devil, the only soul one can bargain with is one’s own, Ophelia,” Alexandros explains, his dark eyes boring into me. “It was not a choice you were able to make, so please grieve for your friends, but do not grieve for your return to us.”

“And even if you had been able to, Cupcake,” Xavier says, cupping my cheek and brushing away my tears with his thumb while his eyes shine with tears of his own. “You would have ended all four of us instead, because not one of us could live without you.”

“The only person responsible for those we lost are the ones who took them,” Axl says.

Xavier snarls. “And Giorgios.”

“Why did he do it?” I ask. “Did you replace out?”

Alexandros and the boys fill me in on everything that passed before Giorgios’s death, and my heart breaks anew. For everything my mates endured. For Lucian.

It all hurts too much.

And I’m tired. So very tired.

Axl pulls me into his arms, and I curl into his body, my eyes closing despite how much I fight against it.

“Will she be okay?” he whispers.

“Yes,” Alexandros answers. “But she has lost much, and it is in her nature to feel others’ pain as acutely as her own. And she is exhausted. Let her sleep.”

I want to stay awake, to bask in the comfort of their presence, but I can’t. Too fatigued and too overwhelmed by guilt and despair, I let the heavy blanket of sleep take me under its weight.