Frederick and Geraldine
Chapter 13 – Carla and Pedro Talk about their Marriage

(TheGovernor has obtained the approval from England to allow Ivan to bringofficially the gold to the Russian nun. Pedro and Carla started to talk intheir bedroom.)

(Pedrosaid,)

''Yourconcern for life and health means more than the pleasure to have

Expensivejewelry; '' ''Can you explain the new conclusion

About ourfamily future to me? '' '' Well, when glaciers calve,

They becomeslowly icebergs- nothing else but pure delusion.

(Pedrocontinued,)

Beatriceknows me better than you; with you I live

A lifetimeof conservative thinking; '' ''make me understand

Yourrelationship with her, when you love and forgive.

Beingcatholic, you must give up your sins, at the Lord's

Command.’’

(...saidCarla. Pedro was seemingly not listening to her. He said,)

''I'vevisited New Spain to understand its reality.

I get backhome to make the change; '' ''It seems that the Indian

People havechanged your thinking; I predict a fatality.

It's just adifferent culture to be trapped in our oblivion.''

(Pedrosaid,)

''Life, inits essence, is guided by the same principles.''

''You couldlearn from the Turks as well as you have learned from

The Indiansto keep your thinking invincible

At least,the Turks are civilized; I think their time will come.''

(Pedro replied,)

''Thecivilization is created; the Indians keep

Theirunspoiled ideas far away from the vices of

The society;Turks always need their wonders on the deep

And someunique ideas coming from above

(Pedrocontinued,)

To changesomething in the evolutionary sense.

Though youhave been in New Spain you couldn't concretely

Differentiatethe old world from the new world and, thence

You couldn'tunderstand Geraldine's origin; discretely

(Pedrocontinued,)

You cannotunderstand the fundamental meaning

Of the lifechange; this is the cause of our separation.

''I feelabandoned in our family; while educating

Our childrenyou leave them to come back with a new conception.

(Carlacontinued,)

You're anindividualist to fight against me; your fight

Is fierceand I feel like I'm thwarted and defeated

Until losingbalance, until the devils mock my sight,

And until Ican no longer resist while I need to be needed.

(Carlacontinued,)

That's why Igot sick; '' '' Beatrice is, in fact, my life partner,

But I haveto divide my time between her and our children.

It seemsthat my responsibility as a father

Made me turnback home and visit New Spain, which is bewildering.''

(RepliedPedro. Carla stopped talking for a few minutes, then she continued,)

''Bella saidthat no one can separate that oath that was made

In theChurch and reinforced by a lifelong contract.

Miguel saidthat the marriage purpose is to get the highest grade

Of awarenessto infer the consciousness abstract

(Carlacontinued,)

Meaning andto have a high moral identity.

Theevolution of the moral conscience leads to developing

The moralidentity, but we may call it, for brevity,

A concept ofconsciousness in the communion of feelings.’’

(Pedrosaid,)

''It seemsthat we have passed this moment, and therefore I want

To change,but in a different way from Descartes, who tried

Toreconcile, using a dualistic way to get in sync,

The idealismwith the materialism when they collide.

(Pedrocontinued,)

You have adual concept of love and an internal

Contradictionbetween the spiritual love and the body

Sensibility;the pulse of your thinking depends on

Your soulmoods; it should be vice versa; you love nobody.''

(Carlacontinued to talk with Pedro in their bedroom. Carla said,)

''I thoughtthat our communion will change me in better, ''

''Whatchanges can you make in your thoughts and actions? This subject

Sickens me, ''''Beatrice is like you and I'm gonna let her

Marry you; Iintend to divorce; I feel like a reject.

(Carlacontinued,)

It's wise toend our loveless marriage, '' '' our home will change because

You chooseto change it; you have a kind of self-confidence,

Which is notgood while I feel your strong attraction to me,

And yourpossessiveness hurts me; do you see the consequence? ''

(ConcludedPedro. She replied,)

''Sometimes,you're too passive and melancholic, '' ''I'm depressed.

You createdan air of mystery; you keep your secrets

Bottled upinside and hidden from me; '' ''I do my best.''

''You don'ttake responsibility though you have regrets.

(Pedrocontinued,)

You arepatient, and you take yourself too seriously.''

''The firstthing Beatrice wanted to do was to make

Our tensiongo along with our life; she loves you dangerously.

I had toovercome the conflicts hoping that you would awake.

(Carla continued,)

I did all mybest while trying to balance everything

We've got tolive a happy family life, '' ''you cannot

Maintainyour emotional balance, '' '' well, love is all or nothing.''

To achievestability, in all your charm I have been caught, ’’

(Pedroreplied. Carla said,)

''The womanmust have equal chances as the man has

Tocommunicate with God; much more, she needs some education

Tounderstand the experience of her man, whereas

The man mustunderstand his wife; '' '' you dance over separation.

(Pedrocontinued,)

The resultis a lack of harmony in our relationship

Affectingour communication and leading to this

Moralmisery; I could see what happened on the ship

Between youand Miguel, '' ''what happened? '' '' Does he know how to kiss? ''

(Carlareplied,)

''Bella'srelationship with God was too intimate and quite

Strangemotivating Miguel to have platonic relationships

With otherwomen.'' He smiled, '' you're unfit to be his mate.

Bella was adecent wife not needing lovers on the ships.

(Pedrocontinued,)

The bride ofChrist is a believer of the Christian Church.

Miguelsuffered because she couldn't give birth to another

Child; he'syour victim, and you must be ashamed at the smirch

Of flirtingwith other men in front of me; you're a mother!

(Pedrocontinued,)

She advisedme to stop being ignorant, but I've told her that

For me, itwas very important to make my personal

Dreams cometrue; '' '' those cures weakened her to fall down like a brat.''

''Whileplaying the violin, she felt so emotional.''

(Carlareplied,)

''Her armswere sensitized, and she felt the deep touch

Of theMedusa while being scared because she couldn't swim.''

''Theydidn't feel the danger though they loved each other so much, ''

''Maybe shewanted her own death, '' ''she was so graceful and slim.''

(Pedrosaid,)

When wecross this line between friendship and hostility,

We need alot of attraction to save our marriage

And tocompensate for what's lost; a betrayal facility,

Thus, iscreated; '' '' Miguel says that something to disparage

(Carlacontinued,)

Is thecontradiction between spouses, which can be useful

When yourpartner becomes a thought of your consciousness

Evolving inmeditation; our passion of love is truthful,

When weunderstand the things that are discrepant or less

(Carlacontinued,)

Familiar;Miguel suggests that the idea about

Theperfection can be continued in another marriage,

Which can beperformed after the divorce; ’’ ‘’ Bella said that, no doubt,

Thesetensions being teased by some sex led to zero and disparage.

(RepliedPedro. He continued,)

Miguel andBella needed each other's opinion

Withoutexpressing any certain aspect of their

Divergentthinking; Miguel could hold dominion

Over yourheart because you were vulnerable and too fair.

(Pedroadded,)

You tookcare of your beauty to maintain this attraction,

In ourrelationship, but your beauty caught his attention,

BecauseBella didn't give him too much satisfaction.''

''Her lovewas based on sense and sensibility rather than

(Carlacontinued,)

Reason andemotion; ’’ ‘’you've made an effort to have a precise

Grace; youuse flowers for your body bath while poetry can clean

Your soul;you eat less and move more than others; so, take this advice

And benatural like Eve; you know what I mean.''

(RepliedPedro. Carla replied,)

''I wantedto prevent this tragic end- the infidelity.

Miguel toldme that we had never been together as soulmates

While youhad thought that my ideas had meant the absurdity

Of theperfectionism; '' '' you pushed me to the betrayal gates

(Pedrocontinued,)

In order toseparate me from Beatrice; every time

I left home,you were wondering if I would do this or not.''

''Ourmarriage was approved by God; from children we hear His chime,

And yourrelationship with Beatrice will come to naught.

(Carlacontinued,)

Miguel wasbetter than you because he chose a platonic

Way tobetray his wife; I've just been humiliated

Whilenegotiating my love with Beatrice; so chronic

Were her mannersto discourage me, but I've communicated

(Carlacontinued,)

With youagainst odds; Miguel had been in search for other

Soulmates;Then, he could admire Bella; God didn't give them

Kids butthey didn't divorce 'cause she wanted to be a mother.

In an impuremarriage, there's a betrayal I can't condemn.’’

(Pedrosaid,)

'' The sinis the occasion for grace while bringing repentance, ''

'' The sincan only diminish this hope to comprehend

Our Lordwhile we can return to the position of acceptance

Through thepure procreation; without name or end

(Carlacontinued,)

Is thesuffering of our children, and they are innocent;

I lost theidea of perfection while you were living

In sin; thedarkness led you to self-destruction; now, ignorant

While livingin anger and passion, you need His forgiving.

(Carlacontinued,)

Being likeBella, I have chosen the human sacrifice.''

''Thisperfectionism is an illusion and, in reality,

We die all;we are all sinners to give up the paradise.

On Earth, toreplace the original perfection is a fantasy.

(Pedrocontinued,)

We can't berescued. I prefer the peace of my mind

To thisfight for salvation; I prefer an ephemeral,

Pleasantlife instead of it; '' I understand that you're still blind.

That's why Ihave a deep relationship with Christ, in general.

(Carlacontinued,)

I'm forcedto accompany you in an aimless journey-

A vagrancy;you forced me to accept this new reality

That wouldchange my destiny; the devil is your attorney.''

'' A needfor a sinful freedom lies in your normality.

(Pedrocontinued,)

You end upignoring the devil in front of death.

Don't forgetthat you stay in a haunted house; '' ''I'm searching

For someviable solutions and for the heaven's breath.''

To be amother is a reality; I'm fighting

(Carlacontinued,)

To save myfamily; '' ''your moral awareness leads

Tounhappiness and anger; '' ''you provoke me to fight

To keep youwhile using sarcasm to banish all my needs.''

''Thismethod keeps my rivals at bay; '' '' you insult me despite

(Carlacontinued,)

Myfaithfulness; you use this jealousy to make me love you

Unconditionally;'' '' Christianity can't bring the man

To theinitial Eden; so, love me as I am, though

I'm not yourAdam, Eve! '' ''Pedro, I am your woman! ''

(He embracedher and started to make love with her after so many years.)