I Grabbed The Leash Of The Blind Beast
Chapter 65: (1)

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“My memories of loving Eleon. That alone is enough for me.”

Mariela hesitated for a moment, wanting to say something. Seeing her mother like this, Elysia smiled resolutely.

“I’m really fine, mom.”

Finally, Mariela let out a short sigh and stroked her daughter’s hair.

“Get some rest.”

“Yes.”

After Mariela left the room, Elysia changed into something more comfortable.

She lay down on the bed, but she couldn’t sleep.

“Sigh.”

After tossing and turning, Elysia got up and sat on the bed.

She pulled a thin chain necklace from the inside of her nightgown on her chest.

It was the compass that Eleon gave her.

「“Because now we will always be together wherever we go.”」

Although the sun was setting, Eleon’s face shone like a pebble bathed in sunlight in the dark.

「“Wherever you go, I go. So you can have it.” 」

Elysia peered into the compass.

A needle, painted red, pointed in one direction with an excited co-click as the compass turned.

It was like my heart.

I will never forget Eleon. 

He seemed to be printed in the direction Elysia was supposed to point.

An existence that cannot be replaced and cannot be forgotten.

Elysia could see that Eleon had become such a special person to her. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t get him out of her mind.

Every word Eleon said, every step he took. 

She pretended not to see, she pretended not to hear, but the nerves in her whole body touched him.

But she didn’t have to have what she wanted, what she needed.

Without air, we would die of suffocation, but nobody wants to have air.

Naturally, if there’s air around me for me to breathe, that’s lucky.

Elysia’s feelings for Eleon were similar.

The time that she has lived until now has been a life marked by avoiding the predicted miserable death that afflicts her mother.

From a very, very young age, Elysia grew up seeing, hearing and reading a single story.

It was a story written in a thick notebook with Mariela’s own handwriting.

The book was hidden in Mariela’s study, and Elysia really liked the story in which her name appeared as a character.

Mariela would look at her impatiently when Elysia read another book, but would only leave her alone with a kind expression on her face when she read that book. So she read and reread the same story.

Enough to memorize the whole story.

Elysia in the book is a beautiful, brave, and happy person.

But the reality was different. Mariela, who wanted to save her from a miserable fate, was always desperate and often frustrated.

Elysia couldn’t understand what was causing her so much pain, but her mother’s pain was no different from hers, so she always tried to comfort Mariela.

「“I’m really fine, mom. I’m not going to die. I will definitely live.”」

Didn’t they say that there is no word for parents who have lost their children? That’s why she thought that.

She had a great contradiction when she resisted saying that she would not die and that she would live.

She gathered non-transmigrator believers in Hadunsha to preach: ‘Fate doesn’t change, so follow God’s will.’

From time to time, when she met Mariela, she swore that she would escape the fate that was destined for her.

In that daily life, the place where Elysia was was a ‘crack’.

Neither on this side nor on the other, the middle and restless spot was where she stayed.

In reality, Elysia often felt that she didn’t know herself well.

Is it because I joined the temple when I was very young?

It’s probably because I don’t know how people think and act.

Her everyday life in the temple was calm, not easily arousing emotional swings.

Sadness, joy, pain, and happiness were all sunk below her calm surface.

The believers were excited to see Elysia like that.

She is a ‘holy and sacred woman’.

However, at some point, she was worried about her own existence.

She thought that she should act this way or that way in Hadunsha.

Mariela would tell Elysia in detail what actions to take so that she could naturally blend in with the other priests.

As a result, Elysia was herself and also the role she was playing.

The original Elysia existed, but in reality, it was just an illusion.

Her own personality, her own tastes, her own likes. 

She had never thought of such a thing.

Will I be able to start over if one day I get out of the original story as Mariela wants?

I just imagined it.

No one asked her for that, and she didn’t need it.

Eleon was the first to ask her what she likes. He was the first thing on Elysia’s mind by her own choice.

     I like you.

I liked the time I spent with him.

I liked his shade, which gave me warmth and a place to stay.

“Eleon.”

I know I hurt him. 

When Elysia lost her memory, her consciousness escaped to ‘Won Yoon-Ji’, which she thought might have something to do with Sonatek’s medicine.

Even when they took her to Laurel Lake, she was forced to inhale the same smoke that was in the Crystal Palace.

When she woke up from a deep sleep and saw him again, the memories buried under her consciousness came to her mind, Elysia instinctively pretended not to know Eleon.

It was like an automatic reflex carved into her body.

Eleon was the male lead in .

She could escape, but Eleon could not.

Elysia wanted to escape Sonatek’s clutches.

But if Eleon doesn’t let her go, she will stay in the protagonist’s realm throughout. 

She sincerely wished he would stop now.

She wanted to free herself from the trap that tormented everyone.

Now, with all her memories back, she could see it clearly.

When she threw herself into Laurel Lake to avoid Sabiel, she spent half her life running to survive because there was no suitable escape route, and the other half hoped that if she died, she would be able to escape this evil fate.

Elysia felt sorry for Eleon, but she didn’t mean to hurt him.

She was just speaking the truth.

「“I’m not the person you’re looking for.”」

「“Stop talking like that. I will destroy everything, be it God or fate.”」

Won Yoon-Ji would have said this, right?

Won Yoon-Ji would have done this, right?

What happened when she lost her memory was amazing.

She had heard of ‘Won Yoon-Ji’ from Mariela.

Won Yoon-Ji was her mother’s previous life.

She now lives as a noble duchess, but the remains of the memories of a twenty-seven-year-old woman who lived a lively life in another world.

Therefore, there was a lack of information in detail.

So looking back, there were times when she spoke and acted ambiguously. It’s because her personality fluctuated in the absence of guidance.

     I told Karina that I would help make things work out with Eleon.

That doesn’t necessarily deviate from the original story, so it could have gone well.