Left Field Love
: Chapter 16

When I wake up in my sleeping bag the following morning, I’m disappointed. I was hoping the past day and a half didn’t happen, and that the sloped eaves of my childhood bedroom would be there waiting to greet me when I opened my eyes. But no, it’s the rough boards of the cabin’s roof that I’m staring at instead. I sigh and fling the covers away.

Considering how I woke up wanting to flee, I’m surprised by how much I enjoy the day. The chaperones are too exhausted from yesterday’s activities to plan anything constructive for today, so it’s essentially a free-for-all.

Almost everyone ends up on the lakeshore, including me. I perch on a rock between two massive pines and sunbathe while reading. Shannon joins me for a bit, but everyone else leaves me alone.

It’s the first full day in a long time where I haven’t had to do anything, and it’s nice. Really nice.

There’s no schoolwork, no farm chores, no responsibilities.

Just the pit in my stomach while I surreptitiously watch Caleb playing football on the thin stretch of sand with his friends. After our canoe ride, I didn’t think it was possible for things to get any more tense between us.

I was wrong.

After dinner, I wander out to the campfire. Along with daytime activities, the attempt at evening entertainment seems to have also ceased for the final night here.

Unlike last night, the split logs surrounding the stone circle are all empty. I take advantage of the space to stretch out along the length of one and stare up at the stars. Someone already built a fire, which provides pleasant warmth and a comforting crackling sound.

The snap of a stick warns me of someone’s approach, but I don’t bother to sit up or look over. “Want to make another bet?” a voice I recognize as Colt Adams’s asks.

“No.”

There’s a soft chuckle. “Well, I’m betting you know why Winters has been in such a shitty mood all day.” I make a point not to react and just keep tracing patterns in the stars overhead.

I definitely don’t betray the surprise his words elicit. Caleb has looked perfectly carefree all day, joking and laughing with his friends.

Colt laughs. “Refusing to talk about it. Maybe you guys do have something in common.” Plastic crinkles. “Want any?”

I finally sit up and see he’s offering a water bottle filled with clear liquid. But I doubt it’s actually water.

“Sure.” I surprise us both by accepting. Colt hands me the bottle, and I take a large sip. Eyes watering, throat burning, I hand the bottle back to Colt. “What is that?” I choke out. I’ve never liked the taste of beer, but at least it’s never made me feel like this.

He grins. “Tequila.”

I cough. Fire is scalding my system as the alcohol works its way through my body.

“Seriously, Adams?” Luke appears, a heavy frown on his face.

“What?” Colt replies innocently, although I know he’s perfectly aware of the reason there’s disapproval in Luke’s voice. They’re obviously not supposed to be socializing with me. Or sharing alcohol.

“Isn’t this nice?” Madison asks, appearing and taking a seat directly across from me.

She’s changed since earlier, just like me. Only aside from donning leggings, she’s wearing a pair of jeans tight enough to appear painted on and a suede jacket that would be more appropriate to wear to a club than a campfire.

“It was until you showed up,” I comment.

There’s a cat sound to my left, courtesy of Jake, who’s walking over toward us. I’m suddenly surrounded by people I don’t want to be around.

“Then why don’t you leave?” Madison retorts.

Now that Caleb’s three best friends are all here, I’m tempted to do exactly that. But my insides are still burning from the tequila. And I’m too proud to let Madison think she scared me off.

“I’m good,” I reply.

“Guess you don’t have any friends to go hang out with,” Madison comments, her expression full of mock sympathy.

“Do you?”

She waves a hand toward Colt, Jake, and Luke. “You’re looking at them.”

I’ve never really understood the dynamics among Landry High’s popular crowd beyond knowing I’m not a part of it. But I realize it’s probably true.

Jake speaks, surprising me. “No need to fight over us, ladies. There’s three of us and only two of you.”

I scoff before lying back down on the log. Maybe that will keep me from feeling like I might vomit.

I recognize a few more voices as they join our circle. Poppy and some of Madison’s other friends slash followers. Ryan James, who thankfully makes a point to ignore me. Then Will, which is a surprise. He’s the first newcomer to address me.

“Uh, Lennon, are you all right?”

I suppose me appearing passed out on a log would look a bit concerning to an outside observer. Nice of Will to notice.

“Yeah, I’m good,” I reply, moving back into a sitting position. “Just doing some stargazing.” My stomach has finally begun to settle, and the burning has abated, leaving behind a pleasant buzzing warmth that reminds me an awful lot of the way I feel around Caleb. Or used to, before dread and uncertainty took its place.

“Really?” Will looks amused.

“Yeah. Just was looking for some peace and quiet. So I think I’m going to head…”

My voice trails as soon as I see him.

Caleb walks between two of the logs on the opposite side of the campfire, taking a seat beside Madison. I got distracted talking to Will, and I missed his approach.

Caleb’s expression is impassive, but he’s exuding an annoyance that’s palpable through the flickering flames separating us. I don’t know if it’s because I’m talking to another guy, or if it’s because I’m among a group that’s mainly comprised of his friends. I’m sure the way we ended our last conversation is also playing a part.

I look back at Will to replace he’s studying me with a bittersweet smile. I’m pretty sure he realizes who just stole my attention for the last thirty seconds, and why.

I scramble to replace a new topic of conversation. “Uh, so is basketball still going?”

Will sends me an indulgent smile. “No. It ended about two months ago.”

“Oh. Sorry.” I laugh, awkwardly.

“Hey, you came to a game. That’s more interest than most people show.”

I manage a small smile. If you’d ever bothered to come to a game, you wouldn’t have asked that, echoes in my head.

“Okay, I’ll go first!” Madison’s exclamation is obnoxiously loud, obviously meant to draw the attention of everyone gathered around the campfire. Which is quite a lot of people, all of a sudden. I spot Shannon, Julie, Marcus, and several others from the group in the woods last night. “Time for Truth or Dare,” she announces.

Everyone’s quieted, so my scoff echoes loud and clear.

Madison’s eyes narrow in on me. “Truth or dare, Lennon?”

“Never said I was playing,” I reply.

“You did last night.”

“And it didn’t exactly make me eager to repeat the experience.”

“Hey!” Jake calls, his voice filled with fake offense. At least, I think it’s false.

I ignore him as I vacillate between my two options. Well, three, really. I could just leave. But I don’t.

“Truth,” I finally decide.

Madison was obviously hoping I’d say dare. It takes her a while to come up with a question. “Who was your first kiss?”

I tilt my head and lean back on my palms, a bit disappointed by her lack of originality. “Ryan was. We played Seven Minutes in Heaven at your thirteenth birthday, remember?”

“Whatever.” Madison looks away, and I get the distinct impression something’s bothering her. Maybe she’s just as uncomfortable about our shared history as I am.

Through the trial, I reap the rewards.

“Truth or Dare, Ryan?” I ask.

He’s not expecting me to pick him, that much is clear. We have a brief stare-off that ends when he answers. “Dare.”

“I dare you to take a dip.” I tilt my head in the direction of the lake. “You can choose one piece of clothing to keep on.” I know from experience that water is cold.

Ryan narrows his eyes, but complies, stripping off everything except his boxer briefs. He’s fit from football, but seeing him mostly naked doesn’t affect me. There are a few muffled laughs around the campfire as he wades into the lake.

I relax in my seat, relieved my role in the game is officially over. I’ll stay for a couple more rounds to make it clear I’m not being run off and then head to bed.

We’re leaving early tomorrow morning and I know there will be a long list of things to get done once I’m back at the farm.

“Truth or dare, Winters?” Ryan returns, fully dressed and visibly annoyed.

Caleb only hesitates for a few seconds. “Dare.”

“I dare you to kiss Lennon.” Ryan pauses for dramatic effect. “On the mouth.” He’s learned from Poppy’s dare.

The challenge is followed by a triumphant look at me. This is Ryan’s way of getting back at me for his dare. He doesn’t think Caleb will do it.

One glance at Caleb’s hard features makes it clear kissing me isn’t a welcome prospect. I know it’s because of yesterday. But everyone else here knows about the years of animosity between us. All of them—especially Ryan—are waiting and expecting for Caleb to laugh and say I’m the last girl he’d ever touch.

Caleb leans forward and glares at Ryan. Firelight dances off his features, which look carved from stone. “You’re a real dick, James,” he accuses evenly.

Ryan rolls his eyes. “Fine. I’ll do something different. How about—”

Whatever else he was going to say gets lost in the whispers as Caleb stands and walks toward me.

I took my time approaching Jake last night, mostly to give myself time to figure out what I was going to do. Caleb doesn’t hesitate. He’s directly in front of me in seconds, holding one hand out.

Blood rushes in my ears as I take it, realizing what’s about to happen. The hostility radiating off of Caleb has me bracing for a harsh yank, but his grip is gentle as he pulls me to my feet. He drops my hand once I’m standing, but it’s only to wrap his arm around my waist and pull me against his body.

I stumble on nothing but pine needles, unprepared for the close contact. I thought this would be a quick, impersonal peck, at most. The bare minimum. I’m shocked he’s doing this at all.

His fingers slide beneath the hem of the sweatshirt I’m wearing and ghost along my lower back. Sparks of heat shoot through me.

“You smell like tequila.”

“I’m trying new things,” I whisper back.

Caleb’s response is kissing me. And I rapidly lose all sense of where I am, of the few dozen people watching us, of all the reasons why kissing Caleb Winters is a bad idea.

It’s a slow simmer that builds to an inferno. This is probably the last time I’ll ever kiss Caleb, so I pour everything I have into it. I don’t know if he’s thinking the same thing, responding to my passion, or trying to get back at Ryan, but his lips are fierce as they move against mine.

His hands slide higher on my lower back, almost reaching the strap of my bra. I weave my fingers into his hair, tugging the strands lightly. Caleb groans, and it vibrates against my tongue.

Our motions are hasty, but they’re practiced. Synchronous, like a choreographed dance. It’s possibly obvious to everyone watching this is not the first time our tongues have tangoed.

Caleb pulls back slowly, the cool air chilling my skin once his hands drop. It all filters back: the people, the place, the game.

“I didn’t think you’d do it,” I tell Caleb quietly.

“Yeah, me neither.” He turns and heads back toward his seat, past more than a few gaping mouths and Ryan’s sullen expression.

Caleb dares Luke to steal a pair of socks from Mr. Tanner’s cabin, and the game continues on from there.

After two more dares and a truth pass, I swing one leg over the wooden log so I can slide off the back. “I’m headed to bed,” I tell Will, who has stuck dutifully by my side. “Good night.”

“Night, Lennon,” he replies, smiling.

I return it, before I stand and head toward my assigned cabin. It’s empty when I enter it, which is a relief.

I’m guessing the girls I’m bunking with will probably have a lot of questions about Caleb’s dare. I only saw Shannon and Julie at the fire, but I’m far from naïve when it comes to the inner workings of Landry High’s gossip mill. There won’t be a senior on this trip who doesn’t hear some mention of it.

I take my time brushing my teeth and washing my face, before I change into pajamas and then snuggle into bed.

There was lots of grumbling about how early we’re leaving tomorrow, but I couldn’t be more thrilled. It’s later than I would otherwise get up, and I’m eager to leave the emotional turmoil of this weekend behind.

Caleb kissing me like that, in front of all his friends…

It doesn’t matter, I tell myself.

It doesn’t change anything.