Non-Human Seeking Re-employment
Chapter 50

(Roller coasters are really fun)

Edited by Silver Wind

Mr. Clown shrunk himself into a corner and shook his head like his life depended on it. "No, I don't want to bring them on a tour."

What if he ended up getting thrashed? He had already suffered from a beating and his face was still in pain— even his foundation could not conceal the bruises.

Helpless, the housekeeper tore her eyes away from the Clown and looked at Susie.

Instantaneously, Susie burst into tears.

"No, I don't want to, they're both scoundrels!" Susie sniffled and sobbed, "They broke all my puppets, those bandits, those robbers!"

Housekeeper: ……

During the "Curtain of Night", the housekeeper had roughly experienced how unreasonable and difficult the pair could be but she did not expect that they had scared the Clown and Susie to this extent.

Left without a choice, the housekeeper could only take the task upon herself.

The housekeeper smoothed out her skirt and walked forward before she inclined her body slightly: "May the two guests follow me."

As she said that, she observed the pair in question without batting an eyelid.

Shen Dongqing looked incredibly harmless and he would even reveal a charming and cute little tiger tooth whenever he smiled.

Beside him was Zhou Wenyan who carried himself with a languid attitude which eased up his overly sharp features, and it gave rise to a certain feeling that perhaps he was easy to talk to.

The housekeeper stabilised her mind and retracted her gaze: "I will be bringing both guests to tour Dreamland."

In actuality, Dreamland was a large amusement park; apart from the Queen's castle, there were a lot of recreation facilities.

The Ferris wheel creaked as it revolved, there was an ice cream cart parked by the street side, and the air was suffused with the fragrant and sweet scent of popcorn.

The illusion it gave was like it was an amusement park found in dreams.

Shen Dongqing headed for the ice cream cart and ordered: "I want two cones of ice cream."

The person manning the ice cream cart was wearing a panda-themed headgear, and he used his furry palm to tap on the black board that was hung in front.

On the surface, the following words were written in colourful markers: Ice Cream/1 Park Coin, Cotton Candy/3 Park Coins.

Shen Dongqing eyed it. "What are Park Coins?"

Wearing a reserved smile, the housekeeper stepped forward to explain: "Park Coins are awarded to you every time you clear an entertainment attraction in Dreamland, and these Park Cons allow you to purchase some goods in Dreamland."

Shen Dongqing tilted his head, feeling suspicious, "Aren't we guests?"

We still have to spend money to eat?

The housekeeper's smile remained unchanged. "These are the regulations of Dreamland, and even Her Majesty the Queen is no exception to it."

She thought about it and supplemented another line: "You have to play a minimum of five entertainment attractions before it can be considered that you have toured Dreamland."

Needless to say, these entertainment attractions were not purely "entertainment".

Thus, Shen Dongqing could only reluctantly bid the ice cream cart farewell. He turned, looking at the nearest recreational facility and said: "Let's go and play that!"

Roller coaster.

From their perspective, the roller coaster's course was bumpy; in one moment it would rush down to the lowest point before it shot towards the skies again and proceeded to make a full loop. Just one look was sufficient to know that it was extremely thrilling, and timid people would probably avoid looking at it altogether.

Housekeeper: "Of course you may."

In a mere moment's work, he had chosen the one with the highest difficulty, how unfortunate.

Shen Dongqing was kind of looking forward to it. "I've never played it before."

Considering how he had been a ferocious ghost, it was impossible for him to play things like roller coasters but now he had the chance.

Zhou Wenyan's interest was lifted as well. "Hm… it seems like lovers would usually have dates in amusement parks."

Shen Dongqing turned his head to look at him, distinctive black and white eyes sparkling as he exclaimed: "Let's enjoy ourselves fully then!"

The housekeeper who had been full of schadenfreude: ……

Was there something wrong here?

This was a Dreamland that wanted human lives, not some kind of amusement park that fulfilled their dreams!

Holding onto the assumption that they would start crying once they got onto the roller coaster, the housekeeper brought them into the entertainment facility.

Generally speaking, no matter what amusement park it was, the roller coaster was the most well-received and its lines were usually packed and long.

However, Dreamland did not have many visitors and the entire amusement park was virtually deserted and the installations used for forming a line were of decorative value. With the housekeeper walking at the very front, they traversed a quiet and long passageway and directly arrived at the depths of the facility.

When they passed the control station, Shen Dongqing subconsciously looked in.

Behind the greyish glass, it could be perceived that a human figure was sitting at the control panel, and they were clad in a uniform. However, their movements were extremely stiff.

Shen Dongqing mumbled to himself: "Looks a little familiar."

Zhou Wenyan heard what he said so he looked over as well and it took him less than a moment to recognise who it was. "It's a player."

It was the person who had folded at the death roulette because he was killed by his girlfriend.

Owing to the fact that his cause of death had been too special, it had left a deep impression on Zhou Wenyan.

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"Please enter," the housekeeper pulled open the railings and made a gesture to invite them in.

Shen Dongqing climbed into the roller coaster impatiently and beckoned Zhou Wenyan over.

Following his lead, Zhou Wenyan sat in the seat next to him and pulled down the safety bars.

The pair had just sat firmly when they heard a clear and resonant "clunk" come from the control station. Immediately after, the facility started up and the roller coaster slowly left port and got onto the tracks.

At the start, the roller coaster was very slow, but once it left the tunnel, it abruptly accelerated without any prior indication and rushed up the slope.

The wind brushed past them, and because the speed was too fast, it sounded like a long whistle.

Shen Dongqing held onto the safety bars as he leaned forward slightly and not the slightest bit of fear could be discerned on his features.

"Wahh—" Shen Dongqing laughed happily as he turned his head, "It's so thrilling oh."

Zhou Wenyan said: "It's quite decent."

It seemed like having some occasional entertainment as they were busy shuttling through games was a good choice.

The tracks for the roller coaster were exceptionally long; after travelling through a sloping path, they still had more than half of the journey to get through.

By the time they went around a huge curve, however, Shen Dongqing felt a strand of hair blowing at him from behind, and it had floated right in front of his face.

"What is this?" Shen Dongqing reached out to grab that strand of hair and he reeled it forcefully.

There was nothing.

Shen Dongqing opened his hand and there was a bundled-up hair strand lying in there. However, he barely managed to distinguish what it was when it was blown away by a fierce wind.

Shen Dongqing twisted his head to look over his shoulder.

There was a female seated behind them.

More accurately, she was not sitting on the seat but standing up on the seat with no safety precautions taken whatsoever. She had four arms that extended from her armpits, and they were akin to claws as she gripped on the edge of the seat tenaciously.

When riding a roller coaster, most players would be fixed to their seats because of the safety bar, unable to move. After all, this was a dangerous attraction; if the safety equipment was not in place, they would be thrown off and be smashed to pieces when they hit the ground.

But to the ghosts and monsters at the roller coaster attraction, their fixed positions made them the equivalent of take-outs being sent right to their door which they could casually pick and eat as they pleased.

Noticing Shen Dongqing's gaze, the female raised her head which shifted the hair in front of her face away and her lips split open to reveal bloodstained teeth. Then, like a spider incarnate, she crawled towards him at lightning speed.

Shen Dongqing became unhappy.

Why couldn't they properly play the roller coaster? Did they have to disturb people?

The four-armed woman did not notice the danger as she stared at Shen Dongqing's nape with dead eyes. Once she thought about how she had fresh meat to eat, she opened her mouth wide excitedly and directly leapt over.

Unfortunately, imagination was the only thing that was beautiful.

Before the four-armed woman had a chance to touch the person seated at the front, her neck was clutched mid motion and she was dragged down forcibly.

Shen Dongqing loosened the safety bar slightly to give himself more space to move before he directly reached out to grab the four-armed woman who was in the midst of pouncing on them.

"How ugly," Shen Dongqing said resentfully. Then, as if he was taking out the trash, he threw the four-armed woman off the roller coaster.

Thankfully, the four-armed woman was nimble and she managed to use her hands and legs to hold onto the roller coaster tracks and she did not drop down.

She watched as the cart took her food further away, completely unreconciled. Hence, she used her sharp nails to scratch the metal tracks to issue an ear-grating, scraping noise.

It seemed like a signal.

A moment later, numerous figures emerged from the tunnel. These people had all mutated; if they did not have several arms then they would have several legs, and they looked like lizards as they climbed onto the tracks.

Right now, the roller coaster happened to be going upslope and the speed was significantly slower which allowed those figures to chase up to them with a few seconds' work. One by one, they landed on the roller coaster and they were packed to the brim.

Shen Dongqing: "How annoying."

All he merely wanted to do was play the roller coaster.

Zhou Wenyan raised the safety bar directly. "Let's get rid of these things first."

Saying that, he flipped himself off the roller coaster and gently landed on the tracks.

The roller coaster did not concern itself with the behaviour its two remaining passengers were exhibiting mid-ride, and it continued to rush forward on its own.

Shen Dongqing lowered his head.

They were currently suspended in mid-air and the distance from the ground was at least tens of metres. Had their courage been lesser, their legs would have gone soft from a glance alone.

The cold wind blew past, billowing Zhou Wenyan's long overcoat.

"This is more fun than being on a roller coaster," said Shen Dongqing as he stretched out his arms.

The places with proper footholds on the tracks were narrow, and with the two standing on it while a group of many limbed people surrounded them, it was like they were standing on a knife's edge where they could fall into an abyss if they were not careful.

Zhou Wenyan's voice intermingled with the wind and its quality was slightly disrupted when he spoke.

"Give me your hand," he said.

In spite of the wind, Shen Dongqing was not delayed in the slightest as he slipped his hand into Zhou Wenyan's. Then, borrowing his strength, he did a roundhouse kick and removed two many limbed people.

The many limbed people were agile in the sense that they could even crawl on the underside of the tracks to get to their location, and some even wanted to pull them through the cracks. Shen Dongqing responded by bending down and sliding down the tracks from the upper side, and stomping on his opponents while he was at it before he was pulled back by Zhou Wenyan again.

The pair seemed like they were dancing cheek to cheek; under their tacit coordination, each and every one of the many limbed people were like dumplings being dropped as they fell down in a series of loud thuds.

The housekeeper was standing at the place where the roller coaster had set off.

The time passed by the minute and second.

The roller coaster was about to come back soon.

Although the housekeeper was under the belief that they definitely would not make it back, she still had to put up a pretence of waiting.

Bang bang—

The sound of the roller coaster was growing closer.

The housekeeper looked over.

As she expected, the roller coaster was without anyone in it, presumably because they met their death in the air.

Inexplicably, the housekeeper heaved a sigh of relief and turned her body around, planning to head back to the castle to report back to Her Majesty the Queen about how the order was accomplished.

However, before she could take two steps, she caught sight of two human shadows – one at the front and one at back – from the peripheries of her vision as they walked out from the tunnel.

Stupefied, the housekeeper could scarcely speak: "You, the both of you…"

Shen Dongqing raised his hand and waved at the housekeeper: "Hi."

After a long moment, the housekeeper choked out the latter half of her sentence, "Why did you come back?"

Even those many limbed people could not handle them?

In reply to that, Shen Dongqing slanted his head and said, "Where else can we go if we don't return?"

Saying that, he lifted the safety bar and sat back down again.

The housekeeper stared at the two individuals who were sitting there neatly and tidily, but she really could not understand what they were thinking.

"What are you trying to do?"

Shen Dongqing: "Playing it again."

Housekeeper: ???

"Did you not encounter something?"

Evidently, the housekeeper had reached the point where she was even questioning if the many limbed people had not shown up on the roller coaster because they had skipped their work.

Shen Dongqing said, "No."

Only encountered a bunch of strange people.

Could it be that they really skipped work?

The housekeeper was full of doubts.

Disbelieving their evil, she allowed the roller coaster to start up again.

Without suspense, the roller coaster set off with a rumbling noise.

Five minutes later, the roller coaster returned again and there were still two people seated in it.

The housekeeper's eyes were about to pop out from their sockets.

These two people were calm in expression as if they hadn't played enough.

Shen Dongqing said: "One more time!"

Meanwhile, the housekeeper was already feeling faint.

The roller coaster returned again. It was unknown how many times they played it, but when the two had enough of the roller coaster, they finally decided to move on to the next item.

When the housekeeper eventually walked out, she saw the pile of the many limbed people forming a small mountain underneath the roller coaster tracks, and it was only then that she understood why the two players were completely fine.

—— All the many limbed people had fallen to their deaths!

Silently, the housekeeper hooked the sign "Maintenance in Progress" at the entrance of the roller coaster.

The chance of transforming into a many limbed person was very small, and she was afraid that even ten or twenty years would not suffice in recovering the numbers they used to have. Thus, the roller coaster could only be closed for the time being.

And because they had played the roller coaster N number of times, they had so many Park Coins that it was impossible to hold them all with both hands.

When Shen Dongqing upturned his shirt pocket, round and hard coins fell down in a series of clatters, and even the puppet selling the ice cream was shocked.

"So many?"  The panda puppet had never seen so many Park Coins in its entire life.

After all, most players would usually die at Her Majesty the Queen's castle, and no one lived long enough to help him with his business.

Shen Dongqing waved his hand in a show of lavishness. "I want all of them!"

The furry puppet was at a loss; against so many Park Coins, he did not know how to sell his sweets, and could only sell his ice cream cart and his entire person to Shen Dongqing in the end.

Pleased as punch, Shen Dongqing sat down on a long bench with an ice cream in one hand and a bucket of popcorn in the crook of his other arm. The furry puppet had situated his ice cream cart nearby and he would give him another ice cream cone once he was finished with this one.

However, it was easy to get tired of sweet treats after eating too much and Shen Dongqing was at his limit after eating two ice creams. Thus, he could only regretfully put down his popcorn bucket and say: "Let's go and play another item, I'll continue eating after we come back."

Zhou Wenyan kneaded Shen Dongqing's hand and felt how cold it was.

"You shouldn't eat more, it's bad for your health."

Shen Dongqing puffed out his cheeks, a little unwilling.

Zhou Wenyan: "Be good, we can bring some back later to eat it."

"Fine—" Shen Dongqing said, drawing out the syllable in his reply.

Honestly speaking, it did not matter how much or what Shen Dongqing ate, but he did like the feeling of someone being concerned about him.

"Let me take a bite of you when we go back."

Zhou Wenyan could not help but smile, "You can have however many bites you want."

The pair were wrapped around each other sweetly as they walked into another attraction.

Meanwhile, the housekeeper followed behind them expressionlessly.

Are you two, people who are capable of tearing apart ghosts and monsters with your bare hands, really talking about whether ice cream will harm your body? The creatures that got their limbs ripped off are crying.

The next entertainment facility they entered was bumper cars.

Without any delay, Shen Dongqing and Zhou Wenyan sat in a blue bumper car meant for two.

Apart from them, there were over ten bumper cars on the arena grounds and masked people occupied each and every one of them. These bumper cars were different from the run of the mill amusement parks in the sense that there were no rubber safety rings around the vehicles itself and they were closer to downsized cars. Thus, the scene of carnage that it would cause once they started bumping into each other could be imagined.

When the bell rang thrice, those masked people looked like they had gone insane as they drove up, with every intention to flatten and crush the blue bumper car.

Shen Dongqing did not know how to drive and his lack of skill transferred to bumper cars as well, thus, he could only let Zhou Wenyan operate the vehicle.

Holding the steering wheel, Zhou Wenyan drilled through every kind of gap he could replace in a masterful manner to allow the bumper cars to mutually crash into each other. In a short while, more than half of the cars were decommissioned and they were redecorated with the splash of severed limbs and blood.

But in the process of that, the other drivers seemed to have understood Zhou Wenyan's tactics and they moved in unison to surround the blue bumper car.

That caused Zhou Wenyan to click his tongue as he eyed the four bumper cars encircling him before he stepped on the accelerator and directly rushed in a single direction. The masked people were not afraid of death in the least, and even under such circumstances, they sped towards him unswervingly.

Just as the two bumper cars were about to collide, Zhou Wenyan forcefully spun his steering wheel in one direction.

ZI—

The tires screeched across the floor and issued a teeth grating sound.

The blue bumper car drifted and made its exit from the side while the other hurtling bumper cars did not have the time to react and they directly crashed together into a heap.

Whereas the main culprit drove his bumper car to one side in an unhurried fashion and came to a stop.

Zhou Wenyan opened the car door and glanced at the racing grounds.

Besides them, no one returned alive.

When the housekeeper saw the pair walk out from the entertainment facility without a single injury on their person, she had already gone numb.

Zhou Wenyan hadn't played to his heart's content yet.

Shen Dongqing said: "Do you want to play it again?"

Before Zhou Wenyan could even answer, the housekeeper intercepted and rejected their request.

"Apologies," said the housekeeper as her heart dripped blood, and she tried her hardest to maintain a placid tone, "The personnel inside have all been…scrapped, conducting another game is not possible for the time being."

Another attraction was made useless.

Shen Dongqing responded with an "oh" before he said: "Let's go to the next one then."

Thus, the pair played every facility available in the amusement park one by one.

The housekeeper followed behind their asses and hung one "Maintenance in Progress" sign after another on the various entertainment attractions they visited.

What kind of players were they?? They were basically demolishing a house!

Initially, the housekeeper thought that everything would be settled once they went through five entertainment attractions but she did not expect that they would wish to continue even after playing five and they would be unwilling to leave.

At her wits' end, she contacted Her Majesty the Queen in a hurry.

Her Majesty the Queen: "Has it been resolved?"

Housekeeper: "… No."

Her Majesty the Queen was a touch displeased, "What is going on?"

Feeling that the incidents that had unfolded before her eyes were beyond description, the housekeeper said: "Your Majesty the Queen, please take a look at it with your own eyes."

The entire Dreamland was under Her Majesty the Queen's control. Hence, she brought out her water mirror and with one glance, she witnessed the destruction that the two players had brought to her entertainment attractions.

One of the players even seemed to notice her scrying eyes, and he gave her a brilliant smile as he tore apart another one of her facilities.

Instantaneously, Her Majesty the Queen felt like she was on the verge of a heart attack.

At that moment, the housekeeper spoke: "Your Majesty the Queen, do you still want to make them stay?"

There has never been a precedent where people left after entering Dreamland.

But these two… making them stay would prove to be extraordinarily difficult. If Her Majesty the Queen was insistent in making them stay, then she could only follow the Clown and Susie's example and abandon her responsibilities and refuse to work in order to preserve her own life.

Her Majesty the Queen went silent for a long moment before her voice suddenly raised by a few octaves as she screamed: "Make them leave quickly! Get them out!"