North x Northwest
Chapter 126

Previous

“Hm… First of all, I’ll have to remove the stitches.”

“…”

Lil nodded her head. Seeing her gesture of approval, Ed started to dig through his bag for something again.

‘What can it be?’

Like someone determined to replace some evidence, Lil examined the small space meticulously. However, the plain cabin gave her the same impression as when she entered it. In the dead of night, the cabin, where the use of open fire was strictly forbidden, felt strangely warm and bright. It was the same sensation she experienced when she came here to seek Ed’s help with the mermaid.

Despite the lack of a particularly bright source of light, the entire room appeared well-lit. There were no dark corners. No monsters were rising from the shadows, nor eyes piercing through the black smoke staring at her.

‘It’s very strange. Normally, Mortu can appear anywhere and everywhere. He isn’t limited to just the Captain’s room… but it seems too bright here for him to enter…’

Lil smiled softly at her small victory and her tension gradually dissipated. She turned her gaze to Ed, who was focusing on her brow with a serious expression.

“Looks like the scab is about to fall off. Be careful from now on.”

“…”

Lil closed her eyes due to the soaring drowsiness.

‘Really, I don’t know why…’

Ed’s voice could be heard in the background.

“…I was very careful so that it won’t leave a scar…”

‘…It’s so bright here…’

“…But thanks to that…”

‘…Weirdly… bright… … …’

“…”

In the end, she didn’t replace her answer.

Ed lowered his eyes after applying a fine ointment along the wound. Unbeknownst to him, he was just in time to see Lil’s eyelashes fall into place and remain closed. His eyes, who witnessed the rare event, froze for a split second, not comprehending the situation. When Ed finally processed what had happened, he immediately held his breath, afraid that the sound of his breathing would wake her up.

After carefully attaching the cotton cloth, he slowly moved away from her. He took a brief look at the person who had unexpectedly fallen asleep. With her eyes closed, Lil looked like a stone statue.

‘You came out of your cabin, brushed your teeth, washed your face, and now you’re back to sleep again… I can’t figure out what your intentions were…’

Ed actually planned to talk to her some more over the course of her treatment, so he regretfully smacked his lips.

‘But, this isn’t a bad development at all. I’m very pleased with the conveniences that come with being her doctor. When she noticed I was looking at her wound instead of her, her rising alertness immediately ceased and she even followed me down here without an inch of doubt. Her wholehearted trust in the effects of her necklace makes her actually more vulnerable than when she knows she’s posing as a woman. Thanks to being her doctor, my relationship with her is definitely improving. She thinks her necklace is impenetrable and I’m benefiting greatly from that belief… But I never expected that she would fall asleep here.’

Lil was already comfortably dressed for bed. Wearing a clean but wrinkled shirt and baggy pants of the same material. It seemed to be a combination chosen at random, making Ed wonder if she would have been more conscious of it if he had met her in such an unusual outfit under normal circumstances.

‘Then I would have teased her and had a good time.’

Ed imagined her expression, with her wide open eyes and her cute mouth yelling at him. But his fantasy was cut short by the realisation that he was robbed of this opportunity and a bittersweet smile hung on his lips. Ed slowly shifted to a lonely mood. But when Lil, who was sleeping, dropped her head, he looked at her in surprise.

Lil’s head, which had bent to her left, stirred violently, causing her untied hair to flutter. Ed was terrified by the scene and tried to shake her out of it, however Lil’s violent nodding continued. He initially thought it was a joke, yet it wasn’t.

‘Her willingness to stay asleep is incredible. Normally, someone who’s uncomfortable would open their eyes at least once, but I can’t even see the tiniest crack in her eyelids… I thought I would wake her up if I breathed the wrong way, but seeing her sleep so deeply, those were some needless worries…’

Her neck, which had been swaying wildly, suddenly snapped backwards.

– Crack. –

Ed quickly raised the back of her head after hearing a crack. At this point, the fact that he hadn’t put her to bed felt like a crime and he started to feel guilty very quickly.

Ed, trying to be gentle, laid Lil comfortably on the bed while assisting the back of her head. He then tried to cover her with a blanket, but he couldn’t because Lil was sleeping on it. Realising this, he noticed her pyjamas clinging to her lying body. Her soft curves were revealed beneath the thin material. He bit his tongue several times before he hurriedly pulled out a cloak and covered her. However, to properly tuck her in, he had to bend over her.

Ed remained motionless for a moment, his head near Lil’s. He simply needed time to process what he had witnessed. He finally tried to raise his head after rubbing his eyes and cheeks with his hand several times. When he did, Lil moved her head and faced him. It had to have been an unintentional toss-and-turn, but it made him extremely happy and grateful. Lil could have turned to the wall, so Ed choked up as she instead faced him. He would never have seen such a sight if she had moved her head to the other side.

Ed stood up and turned on the bedside lamp. Her face, which Ed hadn’t been able to see clearly, became brighter in an instant. It was then that he noticed that the hairs around her face were still damp from her cat-like washing from earlier.

‘I never really noticed it before and it doesn’t fit the way she’s behaving at all, but her cheeks are very chubby and cute. The round skin under her eyes and along her front cheekbones is full and elastic, making her smile more lively and fresher than anyone else’s.’

Ed desperately wanted to poke those cheeks.

‘I want to press my finger down her soft cheeks and surprise her or stretch them out to give her a plump face…. Or maybe I’ll rather bite or suck them…’

At that last thought, he swallowed his dried saliva and gazed at her from her head all the way to her toes. Her body, having expended the last of its energy, was buried in the bed.

‘Will she ever notice or remember…’

But that kind of nonsensical satisfaction wasn’t what he wanted. Ed didn’t want Lil to merely acknowledge him. He hoped that she’d recognize his feeble mind. Give him a warm hug and whisper to him that he wasn’t a bad guy and it wasn’t his fault… Even if it was just for a moment, Ed wished for Lil to remember him, miss him and wouldn’t forget him…

‘…Just like I do now.’

Ed squeezed his fingers and decided to put up with it. He knew that the guilt about his deception would come back to haunt him, but what he didn’t know was how he’d deal with it in the future.

‘Someday… Later… Not now, but in the near future…’

He quietly returned to his chair and sat down…

***

Cesar looked at the empty spot next to him. After pressing it with his hand, it took some time for the hollow cotton mattress to swell back up again. For now, only the wrinkles remained. He swept his hand over them, but all that was left was a chilly spot, Lil’s temperature couldn’t be felt at all.

‘…Is her temperature the only thing I can’t feel anymore?’

Cesar, who tossed his legs for no reason, wondered how long it had been since he opened his eyes.

‘I remember that I woke up for a while when Liloa went out, but I fell asleep again. However, I only slept lightly and eventually woke up again, unable to overcome my sensitivity… I know she replaces it hard to sleep, but why isn’t she back yet? Doesn’t it bother her that I’m here alone like this? Lately, she’s been doing things she hasn’t done in a while.’

Cesar sat up in bed and stared into the darkness that engulfed the room from ceiling to floor. After some time he put on the shirt that was carelessly tossed aside…

***

Lil had no sense of reality around her. Everything seemed distant as if it were a dream. A completely different world began when she awoke from her peaceful and refreshing dream. Lil rolled her eyes in bewilderment, then snapped back to the present.

She first noticed a back hanging over a desk. A man laid on his stomach in such an uncomfortable position that anyone who would see him would feel sore in an instant.

Lil yanked off the cover and looked at the hand which she thought was holding a blanket.

‘This isn’t a blanket, but the one I’m laying on is.’

What she had in her hands was a big coat. Lil set aside the piece of fabric that appeared to be a fur coat, unsure about why anyone would need it in this type of weather.

‘No wonder that I’m sweating so much, look at the thickness of this thing.’

Lil wiped the sweat from her brow and rubbed her fingers together.

“Ed?”

“…”

‘Seeing that the shutters are closed, can it still be night? I have no idea how much I slept.’

Suddenly, Lil was concerned about Cesar waking up without her being there.

‘Oh, God!’

Last night, she only thought about blinking once, but it turned out she actually fell asleep. Still unable to believe what actually happened, Lil rubbed her eyes and noticed that her eyelids were puffy. In retrospect, it also felt like her memories were slashed with a knife. Lil stood up awkwardly, rubbing her eyes once more before tapping Ed on the back.

– – – – –