The Butcher of Gadobhra
Chapter 72: First Strike!

General Sophia Konstantina Themis sipped her tea and scowled. The tea was excellent. The little inn of this backwater town had good priorities. The muffins were average, the veal was on the tough side, her bed was barely better than the ground. But the tea was excellent, and that made up for many lesser sins.

Her tea time being interrupted several minutes early was not a lesser sin. Which is why she was scowling at the annoying paladin that had sauntered into the inn stating, "I'm looking for General Themis."

Sophia turned and stared at the young man in his shiny armor, pinning him in place as effectively as if his feet were nailed to the floor. "Oh my, this must be important! You have a message of some urgency? Please tell me the orcs came over the pass and are threatening the capital. Or a giant migration? I like those. Rebellion? Messy, but so satisfying to put down. How about you explain why you are looking for me rather than keeping me in suspense?"

Sir Timothy was trying his best to stand at attention and deliver his message, but something about the woman in front of him was unnerving. It was like she was seeing right through him, evaluating him, and replaceing him not worth her time. "I'm...I'm supposed to tell you...no, I mean to ask you...Lord Brandon would like to know when we are starting?"

The general took another sip of her tea, finishing the fragrant beverage and nodded her thanks to the innkeeper. Then frowning, she turned back to the paladin.

"That is such an interesting question. Are you accusing me of being late? If so, please have your second talk to my second. You can pick the time, the weapon, and the details of the duel."

"Or perhaps you are impatient and want to hurry me along? Are you assuming that your time is more important than mine? I'm afraid in that case I'm not even going to wait for a duel; such stupidity needs to be dealt with quickly, lest it spread."

"But perhaps I'm being too harsh. Let’s all assume that neither you nor 'Lord Brandon' know how a clock works. There is a mechanical clock on the wall of the tavern. In about a minute and a half a demon and a milkmaid will come out and we'll get to hear the milkmaid hit the demon in the head eight times with her bucket. That means the time is 8 o'clock, and that is when we get started. Go replace 'Lord Brandon' and explain that to him."

Timmy didn't like any of these options, but at least the last one didn't get him killed. He scurried off as fast as he could.

At promptly eight o'clock, General Themis walked into the center of Sedgewick. Behind her were her driver, holding a large book and quill, a soldier from the keep carrying a large set of golden scales which he set on a small table, and a courier wondering how he had gotten drafted for this.

"Alright, let’s go over a few rules and then you can get started killing each other."

"Lord Brandon of Momco. You have read the rules and accept them?" Brandon smiled at Billy. "Yep, nothing in there is going to save ACME from a beating."

"Lord William of ACME. You have read the rules and accept them?" Billy looked at the General and shrugged. "Yes, but I've got an objection to actions taken by Momco leading up to this event. Most of my troops are missing because of corporate espionage."

Themis scowled like she had bitten into a rotten fruit and found the worm. "Not part of the war, not my problem. Objection denied and you lose 5 points for wasting my time. That's my way of keeping you two from bringing frivolous crap to my attention like squabbling children. If it breaks the rules, fine. If not, you lose points over it."

Both Brandon and Billy were silent at this. Neither liked the idea, but neither wanted to challenge her on it and lose more points.

General Themis continued, "And now that I have your attention, let’s go over some of the rules so we can minimize problems and damage to this poor town."

"Damage to town structures that are not objectives will lose the offending side points."

"Damage or destruction of property, goods, vehicles, livestock, or crops of residents or visitors will lose the offending side points."

"Killing residents or visitors will lose you big points. The only exception to this is if that person makes an unprovoked attack against you."

"If you provoke a resident or visitor and they attack you, killing them will also cost you points."

"If the resident or visitor declares for the other side of this little fray, you can kill them. However, you will still lose points for provoking them to take a side in the first place."

"Workers are off limits. Same rules apply to them. Leave them be to do their jobs, or let them sit in their homes undisturbed. "

"If a worker attacks you, you can kill them. They still respawn, but with considerable penalties. After they respawn you cannot kill them again unless they attack you again. Provoking workers to attack you will lose you points each time you kill them."

"A worker can declare themselves a combatant. It's silly because they can't fight. But if they do, they count as an opposing fighter and you will gain points for killing them. If they die after declaring themselves a combatant, they won't respawn."

"If there is an attack by a dragon, an invasion of orcs, or a wandering mob of giants, anyone defending the town will gain points for their side. Doing things that help the town and its residents gains you points. Doing things that damage and hurt the town and its residents loses you points."

"Finally, the easy part. Killing the opposing side gains you points. Each of your surviving combatants gains you points. Controlling any of the three objectives gives you a bunch of points."

"Leaving the area for any reason means you are declared dead and the other side gets the points. If you reenter, you actually die and won't finish your walk out of death until the end of the ten-day period."

"I will be in the town area continuously. I'll be open to non-emergency questions for 1 hour twice a day, at 8AM and 8PM. You will replace me at the inn."

"Now, since Lord Brandon can't tell time, let’s just say that this little war starts when the demon gets hit in the head 9 times. Brandon, start your people on the road at the 3-mile point. All of your people.

=*=

"So, what's the plan?" Layla was sharpening a dagger that had chipped on one of Sammy's ribs. Crappy metal. She should have gone out and gained some levels; her skills sucked and she had no armor - not that it would matter much.

Billy sighed heavily and sat down on the edge of the fountain next to her. "We've got 50 mercenary fighters between levels 2 and 4. If I'd known I was fighting without Vern's killer commando squads and had the time, I'd have gone for rangers, rogues, and assassins and tried for a guerilla war. Not happening. This crew will shout 'YOLO' and charge."

Layla looked over at the group of fighters. They were half drunk and wearing crappy gear. They knew what was coming. "Anything from the quest you put up?"

Billy brought up the screen. "Not much, and it's odd. I have three groups of level 1 and 2 characters that were killing rabbits and doing quests; they all joined up. All from the same guild, I think - they won't last long. Then I have an odd assortment of loners. One of them is actually pretty high level and has stealth skills. I can't see what his class or level are. But he's a madman. Look."

Hello!

I accept your quest. But we are changing things. Your plan is bad. Very bad. The worst. Next war have a lot more people on your side. My military advisor says you will be dead quickly, and the army leaderless.

Don't worry. We will win anyway. I will be your second in command and take over when you die. Also add me to this quest so that I can share it with others after you die in the first charge.

We need a password. The secret password is: "Keel moose and squirrel."

It's more than one word, which is why no one will guess it's our secret password.

Sincerely,

Fearless Leader

PS: Please have my loot ready for me when we win.

Layla started giggling. "He's not wrong. We are going to die quickly. Take him up on the offer. If nothing else it's someone to try and blame when the board decides to roast us."

Billy nodded. He added Fearless Leader to the quest and sent a message to everyone that he was in charge if he and Layla died. Any scapegoat was better than none. "Which brings up a question, Layla my dear. Why are you still here? I'm dead and stinking. You don't have to be."

"Yeah, stupid of me, for sure, but I’ve got shitty choices. I could just take my crew and head back to nowheresville and start building again. Or I could wiggle my butt and bat my lashes at Brandon and change sides. Neither appeals to me."

"This town building crap is boring. I was doing a lousy job until I moved up here, and now I'm having fun. Working for Momco would be very difficult - in ways you can't even imagine. Better to stay here with you and die, and then at your court martial I'll throw you under the bus and move on. Nothing personal."

"You'd disappoint me if you didn't." Billy scratched his head thoughtfully. "What the hell, maybe they'll let me be a contract worker in your new shitty little town. Not my first time working up from the bottom."

=*=

At 9AM, the demon and milkmaid had their usual meeting, and at the ninth hit on the demon's head, there was a huge 'ka-boom' and lightning struck a point on the road between the two armies.

The War for Sedgewick has officially started.

9 days 23 hours 59 minutes 59 seconds

Brandon immediately split his troops - thirty assigned to go far out along each flank, and an additional thirty to circle wide and head towards the objective at Godabhra. This left him one hundred and sixty fighters to kill everything in the town.

Billy chose to defend a fixed position with defenses. It was a classic last stand strategy. Too bad magic changed everything. Magic was the artillery of the fantasy world. Billy could cower behind thick walls, but Hail Storm and Fireball wouldn't care. Which reminded him....

"Mage group, what's the plan?"

The dispirited mages halfheartedly answered back, "We are the artillery of the battle. Artillery doesn't fire until told to. And no collateral damage." What fun was a war if you couldn't cut loose a bit?

As the main Momco forces came within a thousand feet of Sedgewick, someone else had similar thoughts.

Jorges got the attention of the players hiding with him in the cornfield. "Ok, just like I told you. When I yell, you pull back the little levers and release the catch." Several very nervous level 1 characters waited anxiously for his command.

They'd come to Sedgewick because of the newbie areas. Fat rabbits weren't a joke when you had only starter gear. When one of the local workers offered them new armor and weapons if they'd help out in this event, they'd jumped at the chance. That gear was hidden in a hollow tree. They wouldn't need it for their brief role and this way they didn't lose it when they died. And while the gear was nice, the EP they'd get was even better!

"NOW!"

At Jorges signal, six members of raid group 'Kill the Evil Invaders' pulled back on the levers of the six catapults. A small hook disengaged which was followed by all the pent up energy of the machine throwing the long arm forward and tossing the ammunition into the sky.

Vern had wanted them built and tested, and as far as Jorges was concerned, this was a fine test. He'd sent ranging shots to that spot on the road last night until all six were perfectly sighted in. Three of the large machines were throwing fifty-pound boulders that would shatter and kill anything around them. The other three were a bit smaller, and firing smaller ammunition. But what they lacked in weight, they made up for in other deadly ways.

'Ka-thump-thump-thump-thump-thump-thump' came across the cornfield. A few eyes turned, and a couple of players laughed as six scarecrows sprang up out of the corn. "I guess if we were crows that plan might work." A few others, closer to the field and more perceptive, saw the projectiles arcing up. Sadly, their reactions were varied.

One person yelled, “Incoming!” which really just made people look around. Two others yelled, “Duck!” Catapults didn't care if you ducked.

Another player had the correct idea and yelled, "Scatter!" which, while correct, went against Brandon's orders of "Stay in formation" and "Move when I tell you to." Only a couple of people moved.

The three heavy projectiles hit. They weren't explosives, but that much weight falling from on high had a huge amount of kinetic energy. Six players were under or within a few feet of the impact and died immediately. Thirty-four more were wounded, knocked down, and stunned. They were in no shape to deal with the Greek Fire that exploded from the next three missiles. Injured and uninjured alike were now coated in the sticky burning substance. A few rogues and assassins managed to duck one or the other.

Clerics and other healers started casting healing spells, fire resistance, and anything that might help. A druid cast Rainstorm, only to replace out Greek Fire kept burning. Brandon was trying to yell orders with one arm on fire. Timmy managed to wrap the arm in his cloak and smother the flames. The paladin had avoided damage altogether by the luck of being far enough away. "Manfred, take your crew and charge those damn rock throwers before they reload. Everyone else move away from the spot they hit; move up the road."

Ten men led by Manfred started running towards the scarecrows. Reloading and cranking the catapults would take longer than it would for Manfred’s team to arrive.

The workers with Jorges didn't even try. They quickly chopped through the wooden structure to destroy the machines and salvage the metal gears and cables. "Good luck guys, give them hell. The rest of you, grab your loads and let’s get out of here." They headed to the quarry where all the assorted bits of machinery went into a storage area in the wall. Then, working together, they pushed a massive rock into place in front of it. "Not a bad job, guys. Let's head back to town and grab a beer downstairs."

The members of the raid group, meanwhile, ran forward towards Manfred's fighters and formed their line at the designated spot. Missile weapons were useless in the tall corn. They didn't even try to engage the better armed and higher-level characters. When Manfred's group charged, they threw their specially-prepared grenades at the ground. Instantly, sticky, alchemical webbing spread out and captured both groups. The Momco fighters who could reach a foe viciously cut down the low-level characters. Manfred was furious. "What did these assholes hope to accomplish?"

He found out when three ballista fired. When you already know in which direction to point, a few yards of cornstalks doesn’t matter. The three heavy bolts ripped through Manfred's fighters. Five died from skewered torsos and ruptured arteries. Four more died a minute later as the second round of bolts fired. The remaining members of raid group "Kill the Evil Invaders!" moved forward to try and kill the last three enemies who were struggling to free themselves. The fight wasn't totally one sided, but the numbers didn't completely offset better armor and levels. Five of the raid group died along with the last three Momco fighters. The last living member of the raid group shrugged and starting jogging towards the enemy’s main force. The rest of the guys were going to be playing games and having a party for the next ten days and he didn't want to miss the opening fun.

Two workers grabbed each of the three ballista and started moving away from the fight. They had a spot in the deep woods near Gadobhra to hide the machines. It was hard for a player to even look in that direction, and with the trees so thick, the machines would be safe and unnoticed.

The lone raider came out of the cornfield near a group of people in robes. They paid him little attention - maybe because he was just one person and was walking slowly, winded from the long run. Rather than yelling, he waved and walked up to them. No one reacted until he pulled his sword out. He managed to actually kill a mage who was looking the other way. And then he was engulfed in fire, acid and ice as several panicked players blasted at him. And thus died the last member of "Kill the Evil Invaders".

You have died. Any possessions and money will be returned to you if you are on the winning side of the conflict, and lost if you are on the losing side of the conflict. You will be unable to log out of the game for ten days. You may join your guild, stay in your own area, or just float in grey nothing and play video games for the next 10 days.

Congratulations!

Raid Group 'Kill the Evil Invaders' has killed the following players:

Borneo Bearslayer Warrior Level 5   Cracked Skull

Lucy the Lawless7 Barbarian Level 4       Bleeding from lost limb

Abercrombie the Mystic Wizard Level 5      Removal of spleen and liver by shard of rock

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Manfred the MainMan             Skewered by a large stick

Zacty of the Zatterpus Clan Shepherd Level 3    Immolated by flames

Morticus the Necromance Level 4         Failed to see a sword coming for his neck

Your raid group has killed 51 Evil Invaders!

You have gained a level, you are now level 2

You have gained a level, you are now level 3

You have gained a level, you are now level 4

You have earned 1000 EP that may be applied to either DEX, INT, or STR

You have gained the Skill: Fire Siege Engine at Level 0

This skill is a tertiary skill that uses DEX, STR, or INT as its stat.

Your guild leader has changed your guild's name to: First Strike!