Hikaru ga Chikyuu ni Itakoro……
DramaCD, 1 - Go Forth, Flirting delinquent!

DramaCD, Chapter 1: Go Forth, Flirting delinquent!

Hikaru: Now then, Koremitsu, let’s do our best and woo some girls.

Koremitsu: Ack, are we really doing this?

Hikaru: Of course! Are you not the one who made such a request tome “Got it. Teach me the ways you pick up girls, (probably a sentai pose) and turn me into a delinquent great at wooing girls.” Koremitsu.

Koremitsu: I didn’t! Anyway, what’s this about a delinquent great at wooing girls?

Hikaru: Koremitsu, you are being too loud.

Girl: Mama! That red haired devil down there is muttering something dangerous over there!

Mom: Mami, don’t look. You’ll get (your head) eaten! Let’s hurry off!

Koremitsu: Who wants to eat you up? Damn it, it’s your fault here.

Hikaru: It is to be expected. You are the only one who can see me here.

Koremitsu: Ugh, I wanna go back.

Hikaru: No can do, Koremitsu. We agreed to go out and woo girls, right? To learn how to deal with girls and maintain an appropriate distance from them, no?

Koremitsu: Kuh…

Hikaru: Try and remember the commotion you caused yesterday at the pool with Shiiko and Miss Shikibu.

Koremitsu: Nargh…I don’t want to think about that.

Hikaru: I can understand how you feel. You have several girls fighting over you in a public place, your swimwear got pulled down, and your buttocks were exposed in public. That certainly was a rather perverted, or I should say, a troublesome matter at that.

Koremitsu: Argh, are women always so disobedient?

Hikaru: But that is what makes them cute. When you continue to serve your feelings towards them, their hearts will never open like a tightly shut flower bud. When they know of your feelings as true love however, their hearts will bloom beautifully like the flowers, embracing you gently within their arms.

Koremitsu: don’t you ever get embarrassed saying such things?

Hikaru: Hm? What?

Koremitsu: it’s nothing. I’m just a big idiot asking you such a thing.

Hikaru: But you are not an idiot, Koremitsu. You are kind and brave, the friend i am so proud of, my hero!

Koremitsu: What’s with this out of a sudden?

Hikaru: These are my true thoughts though. I really hope that you will be able to replace your happiness. I do not know how long I can remain on this Earth, so I want to do my best in helping you while I am still beside you. no matter how little it may be.

Koremitsu: Hikaru…you…

Hikaru: (Sparkles) Now then, let us go woo some girls!

Koremitsu: You…! Ugh, seriously. Understood I’m a man, and I can’t take back what I say.

Hikaru: Right, so first, let me demonstrate to you.

Koremitsu: …Okay?

Hikaru: Love or wooing, they both start from the stare. When you decide on who it is, look right at her, and when your eyes meet, she will most likely lower her stare shyly, or stop in their tracks. That is where you have to smile and talk to her.

Koremitsu: But what do I say?

Hikaru: You simply have to first replace any outstanding qualities of that girl, and then lavish a whole lot of praise on her, like for example ‘your hair is really beautiful. I really have powerless to those with such hair. The tender inward curls are as cute as a White Clover. Do you know, the floral language of the White Clover is ‘a promise’? It feels similar to our situation now, for you see, my meeting with you today is definitely not a coincidence, but a destiny promised in the past. Hey, if possible, I want to know more about you. Do you want to have some tea with me?’ If you go about saying something like this, I guess it will be fine just like that.

Koremitsu: What ‘just like that’! Isn’t it dangerous to say something like fated person the moment we meet!?

Hikaru: That is not true though. I do feel that no matter what girl it is, an encounter is a destiny in life.

Koremitsu: So it’s a warehouse clearing of destinies?

Hikaru: How rude. I will not sell an encounter short. I simply chase up to it and grab it tightly.

Koremitsu: Ah, I see.

Hikaru: Now then, since you do understand, Koremitsu, how about we begin this?

Koremitsu: Eh, now?

Hikaru: Of course, come on, look around.

Koremitsu: Looking around, I do replace both women and men backing away from me.

Hikaru: Koremitsu, you cannot lose to the hardship of life. It is okay; even if you are called the hoodlum king, lolicon delinquent king in school, you are just a red-haired delinquent with a savage look here. Use your eyes, use your eyes to look.

Koremitsu: Huh? What sort of an encouragement is that? Tch, guess I don’t have a choice. I’ll start with the woman wearing the white dress there.

Hikaru: Start with…it sounds like you want to murder someone here.

Koremitsu: Are you even on my side?

Hikaru: Oh yes yes, okay, do your best, fight! I am with you.

Koremitsu: Actually, it’s more like you’re haunting me, you bastard. Huh? That woman in the white dress’ gone.

Hikaru: Hm? That girl ran off after you gave her a look. Her skirt fluffed in the wind, cute as the fluttering flowers in the wind.

Koremitsu: Huh? Why did she run away after seeing me? What should I do before we even look?

Hikaru: Koremitsu, whatever goes, failure is the mother of success. Now then, on to the next one.

Koremitsu: Ugh, I guess it’ll be the one with the hair tied behind her head.

Hikaru: Koremitsu, that is called a ponytail. A girl with a ponytail always leaves the back of her neck undefended, and the fluffy hair does have an unadulterated sensual feel as it sways along with the footsteps like a rooster crown. Ah, huh, that crown girl ran off.

Koremitsu: Hey, Hikaru, if I look in the eyes, they’ll feel embarrassed, right? That crown-haired girl I just met in the eyes ran off without a second thought!

Hikaru: It is a common theme to fail once or twice. How about the next girl then?

Koremitsu: Which one?

Hikaru: That one, the short-haired girl standing there. An intellectual looking beauty with a cool expression like a Clemantis.

Koremitsu: Ah, that one? Tch, didn’t she run off?

Hikaru: Now then, try the cute girl with the round, puffy face like a Tulip.

Koremitsu: A Tulip girl. Ah, she got away.

Hikaru: Next one, try the girl with the unkempt hair like a Peony.

Koremitsu: Peony, unkempt. Ah, uhh, she got away.

Hikaru: Eh, next.

Koremitsu: Hey, Hikaru.

Hikaru: It is okay. Ah, yes. Greet the next girl the next time you meet her in the eyes.

Koremitsu: Greet?

Hikaru: Yes, it is still too early to give up now. Even a persimmon tree needs 8 years to bear fruit. You need to spend time to bear such sweet fruit.

Koremitsu: You want me to spend 8 years wooing a girl!? Ack, ouch! Who is it!

Hikaru: How wonderful to be hit on the head by an empty can. This surely hints at an encounter with a certain female later on. (Remember, this story is set in Suetsumuhana)

Koremitsu: How can such a thing be possible here!?