The Beginning of The End
Chapter 84

We searched the entire castle under miles of land and forests surrounding it, yet we found no sign of Miya. The other human slaves couldn't even remember the last time they saw her, all of them so busy with the chores that they must complete each day.

It sad to think that they must live like this, but until Darax is defeated I can't change any of it, not yet. But I will.

I will make this world safe for all those who live here.

If my mates will let me.

I fall back into one of the chairs around the dining table, waiting for Maddox and Ryker

to arrive, the day had really taken its toll on me and all I wanted to do was sleep.

But I couldn't, not until I knew that my friend was safe.

Why must it be one step forward and another three back?

Every-time something good happens, multiple bad things happen right after, it never stops.

The entire world is against me, including the gods, and I have no idea why.

It's always been the same, even before the end.

I've always had to worst luck with things, and nothing ever goes to plan.

I have to replace Miya, even if I'm destroyed or killed doing it, because I know in my heart

that she would do the same for me.

We were always meant to be friends.

I'm meant to protect her, but I've failed at that too.

I fail at everything.

Henri sits down beside me, placing his hand on mine, "I'm sure that we will replace your friend." He says softly. "She couldn't have gotten far."

"Unless someone took her." I mutter, throwing my head into my hands. "It's all my fault."

Henri pauses, "How could it be your fault?"

"Because her life has gotten worse since she met me." I say through a sob, "ever since I found her all we've had is terrible luck, and now she's missing and it's all because I was distracted."

"You are not responsible for this." He says with a slight growl. "I may not have know you long, my Queen. But I know enough to realise you would never put anyone you care about in a position where they could be hurt, and correct me if I'm wrong." He laughs a little. "You are the entire reason she has even survived this long."

I did save her from the hounds back in our world.

But what about since then?

We had weeks on that farm, safe and happy. But then we were attacked by the dragon king and forced into all of this mess.

All because I am their mate.

She would have been better of leaving me the second I saved her and she found out what I was.

"It's because of what I am she is in danger." I argue, slamming my fist into the table. "It's all because I am fae!"

"Your wrong." Suer says, stepping forward and leaning his arms on the table. "She has known a life other than fear because of you, you found the farm and you got her and her people there did you not?"

"Well yes, I did get them all there but-"

"Then you saved them." Suer says harshly, "that town was destroyed the night you got them out, the immortal ones destroyed everything."

I pale.

If they had stayed there, if Miya had left it another day, they would have all died.

I still have hope that some survived the attack on the farm, but I'll never really know, and it's best that I don't.

My very presence would mean death for so many.

"Did Ryker attack the farm because he knew I was there?" I ask, the question had been eating away at me for weeks.

Was I the reason it was all destroyed?

"No." Henri says with a scoff. "Ryker didn't know who you were until you attacked him to save the human."

I thought that would make me feel better.

It doesn't.

"They were my friends." I say with a sigh, "How could I ever forgive them for killing them?"

"Easy." Comes a voice from the doorway, Ryker stepping inside. "We take it one step at a time."

He ignores Suer and Henri and walks straight towards me, dismissing them both with a wave of his hands.

My guards flee without a word.

"I know." I sigh, wiping away fresh tears that begin to slide down my cheeks, "I know that we don't have a magic manual that will tell us what to do." I sniff. "But I was hoping that maybe you changed your mind, that you regret your actions, even a little bit?"

Ryker sits in the chair next to mine, "I can't regret what I have done to survive and I won't lie and say that I didn't enjoy it."

My heart shatters a little.

Of course he doesn't regret it, he was born to be a monster.

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He was made to kill and destroy.

"How can I regret the actions that brought me to you?" He says in a softer voice, "I'd

do it all again, and I'd murder as many as I could, just to get back to you."

Maybe my heart isn't broken, maybe my head is.

I'm so confused. I don't know how to feel.

He's attractive in ways I never thought I'd see anyone, and he's destroying my resolve little by little each day.

I want to hate him. I want to hate them both.

But the things they say catch me off guard.

The love they show me is precious because I know they would never show it to another

soul.

I know deep inside that I am the only one they will ever care about, even if they don't always know how to show it.

But god, it's hard. It's so hard to accept them for who they are and what they have done.

Should love be this hard?

Am I in love? Or is it just the bond?

I don't know.

Maybe I'll never know.

Perhaps I don't want to know.